The Facts of Life

I figured that as long as we are (or I am) talking about scarring children with the TV shows of our youth, I may as well launch right into the other little "horror show"- The Facts of Life.  Remember Jo, Tootie, Blair and... and... I can't remember the other girl's name and am too lazy to look it up right now.  Nancy?  N, Natalie!  (Yes, I looked it up.) And of course, Mrs. Garrett.  I remember watching the show weekly and enjoying it.  (I also liked to think I was like Jo.  I was definitely a tomboy but not as tough.)

When my daughter was starting middle school, it seemed to be a good time to introduce her to "The Facts of Life". (And, yes, this IS the same child I scarred with Davy and Goliath.)  Again, I foolishly relied on my memory as to the content of the show.  I told her that it might be corny because it was from the 80's but the girl and friend stuff would still apply and that she should check it out.  I decided to show it to her AND her friend.  (Why just scar one when you can scar two just as easily.)

In my brain's defense, we had no DVRs back when I watched it.  (VCRs, yes- but no "set it and forget it" feature to get a whole season saved.)  I might not have started watching the show from the first season.  And the pilot/first year is often a little rough around the edges.  The cast and setting can be tweaked after the show gets picked up.  So let's just say that it's not totally my fault that the show wasn't what I remembered it to be.  If the library had only had the second season on disc, it might have been a completely different experience and they might have liked it. 

"How bad could it be", you wonder.  What could it be worse than killing the grandma on Davy and Goliath?  Well, remember the song?  "You take the good, you take the bad..."  I remember the "bad" things being minor things.  Little comedic-moral vignettes.  But not in the first season- they were waaayyy heavier subjects than I remember.  After the pilot went so wrong, we tried to find a better episode.  One that was fun. (As I was insisting the show really was.) These little innocents were sooo not ready for what this show was throwing at them.  I will give you a list of examples of "the bad" they wound up seeing as I searched for "the good":


1.  The whole cast wasn't in the first season.  Jo was missing and there was a whole bunch of strangers in the cast.  (Molly Ringwald was there- which I have no recollection of...)

2. There was a parent's weekend and one girl's father was too busy to come so the mother attended alone. Inversely, another girl's mother was too busy and the father attended alone.  Those children were feeling disappointed.  Now imagine their feelings when their parents who did come were spied getting busy in the bushes!


3.  Blair was implying that a housemate was a lesbian and tormenting her.


4.  Marijuana.

5. Eating disorders.

6. Sex.

and the crowning jewel of this experience?

7.  A girl committed suicide!  

Wow.  I thought the show might introduce a few good talking points while Tootsie happily skated around.   Nope.  It was "scared straight".  It was as if I was throwing pamphlets and barraging them with every horrible health class topic from middle THROUGH high school all at once!  They were thoroughly traumatized .  Excellent.  Again.

Don't make my mistake, people.  Prescreen.  Prescreen.